I have written in the past about the stigma of mental illness among young black men through the lens of DMX’s struggles. I want to return to that idea again today. A young man who I visited in jail last week spoke to me of feeling like he was “cracking up.” Those were his words “cracking up.”

I think that one of the most neglected aspects of the incarceration experience is the mental torture that many prisoners experience while locked up. I have not read a lot of prose that speaks to this reality. However, I have heard this idea expressed in some rap music over the years. I am particularly thinking of the song “Hail Mary” which was posthumously released by Tupac. Below are some of the relevant passages:

Penitentiaries is packed with promise makers
Never realize the precious time the bitch niggaz is wastin’
Institutionalized I lived my life a product made to crumble
But too hardened for a smile, we’re too crazy to be humble,
we ballin’, catch me father please, cause I’m fallin’

In the liquor store, that’s the Hennessee I hear ya callin’,
Can I get some more? Hail ’til I reach Hell, I ain’t scared
Mama checkin’ in my bedroom; I ain’t there
I got a head with no screws in it, what can I do
One life to live but I got nothing to lose, just me and you

On a one way trip to prison, sellin’ drugs
We all wrapped up in this livin’ life as thugs
To my homeboys in Quentin Max, doin’ they bid
Raise hell to this real shit, and feel this
When they turn out the lights, I’ll be down in the dark
Thuggin eternal through my heart, now Hail Mary, nigga

The video for the song focuses on revenge but it also captures the sense of someone going out of his mind as he is locked up.

While many (including me) have written about the fact that prisons have become warehouses for the already mentally ill. Much less is written about the fact that prison can precipitate depression and mental illness in people who were not previously ill. This is an area that deserves much more attention.

I want to end with a spoken word piece called “My Mind’s Playin’ Bricks On Me” that I have previously shared on this blog. It comes from a young man who participated in the Free Write Jails Arts and Literacy Program at the Cook County Juvenile Temporary Detention Center. Listen to his words (MP3) which I think movingly convey the mental strain of being incarcerated. I don’t know if that poem is inspired by the Geto Boys’ searing portrayal of a man descending into the depths of mental illness in their song “My Mind’s Playing Tricks on Me” but it’s worth sharing that song here too.